I’m 12 years older than my husband and when we first started dating, I assumed that would end up a deal breaker. He thought having a young child would be a deal breaker.
We got close very quickly but we decided to not include his than 2 1/2 year old daughter until we were sure there was a real relationship. I met her right before Thanksgiving and she’s been a part of my life ever since. Originally we had her every other week but due to job changes, we now have her every weekend.
It was a transition going from single, no child to family. But her and I bonded pretty quickly and I am proud to be her stepmom. If a person is important to you its vital to understand that their child is important too and you must do what you can to establish a relationship with them too. I was lucky that I didn’t need to go above and beyond to integrate her into my life and now into our lives as a family. I think its because she was so young and is such a loving little girl that i had it easy. A little shiny purse with some change in it started the whole thing 🙂
I’m not sure how it would be if he didn’t have her. She actually bonded us more. If she were older… I’m not sure how different it would be. I’m pretty good with kids and always wanted one but never was able to have one. Time will tell but for now, I love her like my own and cherish these times of learning and drawing and wanting to do things as a family. She is a very important part of my life.